Children and Parenting
Every child is different. Even within your own family, especially if you have more than one child – as you are more than aware, each of them will have their own distinct personality.
And, depending on their ages, they will more than likely be at different developmental stages and will have different needs. You as a parent can provide those needs in a child focused way. That may mean that you have to put what you want or desire on the backburner whilst you are ensuring that you are giving your children the best start in life.
Things to keep in mind
Remember – a lot of the time, if not always, it is the quality, not quantity, of time that you spend with children that counts. It is the experience. No child (ourselves included) ever looks back and says “so glad I spent every second week with Mum. #BestTimesEver!”. Instead we all reflect on experiences i.e. “I loved that time I went to the park with Dad and we got chased by an angry seagull who was after our chips!”.
Children don’t see who is ‘best’. They are not like us adults. Children see Mum and Dad and they love you both. You are their world. Remember that. Your actions or inactions will have a huge impact on them. Let’s make that impact for the better.
So, how are parenting arrangements worked out?
On 9 May 2024 the Family Law Act had major amendments to the parenting sections and there is no longer a presumption for there to be equal shared parental responsibility and there is no provision that the Court must look at shared time of a child.
Let’s look at what the Family Law Act specifically now says.
The types of Orders that can be made regarding children
Firstly, we need to know what type of Orders a Court can make regarding your children. Below is a list of some of the issues that a parenting order can deal with:
+ the person or persons with whom a child is to live
+ the time a child is to spend with another person or other persons
+ the allocation of parental responsibility for a child
+ if 2 or more persons are to share parental responsibility for a child--the form of consultations those persons are to have with one another about decisions to be made in the exercise of that responsibility
+ the communication a child is to have with another person or other persons
+ maintenance of a child
+ any aspect of the care, welfare or development of the child or any other aspect of parental responsibility for a child
Parental Responsibility
The Family Law Act states that each parent has parental responsibility in relation to a child.
Parental responsibility has nothing to do with the time you spend with your child - The Family Law Act defines it as meaning “all the duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which, by law, parents have in relation to children”. I.e. it is to do with the decisions that need to be made about the child.
Remember - parents have responsibilities; children have rights.
Without a Court Order, each parent has Parental Responsibility and the Family Law Act states that if it is safe to do so, parents are encouraged to consult with each other about major long-term issues regarding the child and in doing so, have regard to the best interests of the child as the paramount consideration.
A Court can Order that parents either have joint or sole decision - making in relation to all or specified major long - term issues.
So what does “major long-term issue” and “best interests of a child” actually mean?
Major Long Term Issues/Decisions
Major Long-Term issues is defined in the Family Law Act as meaning issues about the care, welfare and development of the child of a long - term nature and includes (but is not limited to) issues of that nature about:
To avoid doubt, a decision by a parent of a child to form a relationship with a new partner is not, of itself, a major long - term issue in relation to the child. However, the decision will involve a major long - term issue if, for example, the relationship with the new partner involves the parent moving to another area and the move will make it significantly more difficult for the child to spend time with the other parent.
They are essentially the types of decisions that parents are encouraged to consult one another about before making a final decision. Parents are encouraged to make joint decisions regarding major long-term issues.
(a) the child's education (both current and future); and
(b) the child's religious and cultural upbringing; and
(c) the child's health; and
(d) the child's name; and
(e) changes to the child's living arrangements that make it significantly more difficult for the child to spend time with a parent.
Best interests in relation to a child
When parents are making decisions about major long-term issues for their children, or if the parents cannot agree and a Court must make the decision on their behalf, then the best interests of the child must be regarded as the paramount consideration.
“Interests” are defined in the Family Law Act to include “matters related to the care, welfare or development of the child.”
“Care”, “welfare” and “development” are not words that are defined in the Family Law Act, however the Act does set out factors that the Court must take into consideration when determining what is in a child’s best interests.
what arrangements would promote the safety (including safety from being subjected to, or exposed to, family violence, abuse, neglect, or other harm) of the child and each person who has care of the child.
any views expressed by the child
the developmental, psychological, emotional and cultural needs of the child
the capacity of each person who has or is proposed to have parental responsibility for the child to provide for the child's developmental, psychological, emotional and cultural needs
the benefit to the child of being able to have a relationship with the child's parents, and other people who are significant to the child, where it is safe to do so
anything else that is relevant to the particular circumstances of the child
Determining what is in a child’s best “interests”
The Family Law Act sets out 6 general considerations that the Court must take into consideration when determining what is in a child’s best interests and they are:
In considering arrangements which promote the safety of the child or person who has care of the child, the Court must consider any history of family violence, abuse or neglect and any family violence order that applies or has applied to the child or a member of the child’s family.
What happens if we cannot agree on what is best for our children?
There are the Pre Action Procedures that parents needs to comply with before they can ask the Court to make a decision about their children.
If you are still having trouble coming to agreements about the parenting arrangements for your children, then let’s have a chat.