Tips on how to survive burnout mid-career especially if you’re thinking you’re over it and just can’t do it anymore
“There are times when I’ve been in a hole, I’ve had brain fog. I sat down to do something, but nothing. I mean I knew exactly what needed to be done – I could see it all in my head, but when it came to the actual doing… I had absolutely no motivation or will power or discipline (call it what you will) to do it. I just sat there staring at the file or the computer screen…”
This one is for all us lawyers that have been doing this work day in and day out since we left uni… for some a lot longer than others. Regardless of how many years, we have all had those times where we just feel, blah. We don’t have the mojo to keep on keeping on and we have just lost our motivation. I know I have – many times over the course of the 20+ years I have been doing this gig, and for various reasons.
Whilst I knew (know) I still loved what I do and I didn’t see myself doing anything else – I seriously cannot see myself doing anything else! I’ve prepared for this since I was 18 – when I first went to uni – there are times when I’ve been in a hole, I’ve had brain fog. I sat down to do something, but nothing. I mean I knew exactly what needed to be done – I could see it all in my head, but when it came to the actual doing… I had absolutely no motivation or will power or discipline (call it what you will) to do it. I just sat there staring at the file or the computer screen…
And in those times when I took stock I realised that for far too long I’d been working 14 hour days, 5 or 6 days a week, or when I have experienced grief and trauma from my father passing or my long term relationship ending… then on the weekends I would been so exhausted from the week that I just slept, it had been over 12 months (if not longer) since I had a proper break, I was drinking more, my diet left a lot to be desired and my idea of exercise was the walk from my car to my desk and from my desk to the coffee machine…
I was burnt out. I was tired. We have all been there and I know that we just stupidly ride it out and get over it and get back on track only for those feelings to come back again later, maybe weeks, months or even years later. I know that I had been in this vicious cycle for far too long thinking it’s normal, that all lawyers go through it. The place where I was at wasn’t a good or healthy – I was just ignoring my well-being by pushing through to the point where it then affected my health, then my relationship then my work.
Our profession has this ideology that burn out is normal. That we just need to push through it and get the work done. I mean, law is hard right? It is part of the job right? We are letting it get to us when we should just push through it and get on with the job… right? Ain’t nobody got time for burnout! And because not everyone talks openly about their struggles (because who wants to think they’re being judged, or that they are showing weakness?!) we keep it to ourselves and it can become worse, or we deal with it by drinking more (a lot more) or find other ways to ‘self-medicate’. After all, that is the Aussie way, isn’t it?!
Well, it’s not and it shouldn’t be. So, my tips for practitioners to help heal from their burnout (this is just my perspective and what has helped for me – everyone will be different, however these tips cannot hurt!):
Drink more water. Sounds simple, but it’s so effective. We forget that biologically we are made up of something like 75% water. We depend on it for survival and for optimal functioning, however for most of us it is usually the least consumed liquid, opting more for coffee etc which actually makes us dehydrated. Be more conscious of your water intake and try and drink around 2 litres a day (sounds like a lot but it’s only four 500ml water bottles (recycle – use the same bottle!) or 6 glasses throughout the day). You will find that even after a couple of days you will have more energy and more clarity.
Talk to someone. Don’t bottle it up. Talk to your partner, friends, your parents, your siblings, a counsellor – someone. Keep a journal; put your feelings and thoughts down on paper. You will find just getting a lot of things off your chest will help. It’s a lot easier than having those thoughts/feelings constantly bouncing around inside your head.
Learn to say no. There is great power in that word. Communication is key when saying no. But practice the art of saying no. No to extra work (obviously it’s not that easy, especially saying no to your boss!) But saying “I’ve got x, y, z on so I won’t get to this until Friday, is that ok?“. That way you give your boss knowledge of your current workload and when you are likely to get to whatever they are wanting. It gives them the opportunity to delegate or help you with prioritising your current workload. No to working late into the night. I have a 5pm cut off time for when I start pack up – there is always tomorrow and guess what, after a night’s sleep and rest, I actually come back sharper and more energised. No to working on weekends… don’t make working weekends your norm. It sets an unhealthy standard that should just never be set. In my opinion no boss should expect their employees to work on weekends. You need your weekends for you (not for someone else).
Concentrate on something other than work. Have a hobby. Something you love to do or something that you want to change. This is another reason why you need to have a cut off time for work in the weekday and not work on weekends. Those days and hours are for you to concentrate on you.
Things will wait. That is one thing I’ve learnt after all these years. Say it with me “things will wait”. There will be exceptions obviously – but they are exceptions, not the rule. Again, communication is key. Keep people updated. For example you could say to someone “sorry, but I’m not going to get to that by Thursday, I’m hoping to have it done by Monday and if there are any issues that may affect that time frame, I’ll be in contact immediately“.
Take a break – a real break. We get 4 weeks annual leave for a reason – use them! Whether that is in one big break every 12 months or breaking it up every 6 months. But use them! Don’t accrue leave and have 16 weeks accrued but you haven’t taken a break in 4 years! I have a policy of mental health days. If you’re not feeling it, and you don’t have anything pressing on, just call and say you’re taking a mental health day. Not a sick day, those are reserved for when I’m physically sick. It also means that I’m not lying to anyone. Same with my staff – I know they’re honest and if they want to take a day off just to have a time out, they can. That’s what the annual leave is for.
Change your diet. Take stock of what you are consuming. Us lawyers love a challenge – we thrive on it! So, challenge yourself. What I’ve done is challenged myself to 100 days of clean eating, being more conscious of my water intake and exercise!
Sleep – know how much you need and make sure you get it each night. Everyone is different. For example, I need 8 to 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep to work efficiently otherwise I get grumpy, irritable, and I’m just not pleasant to be around. When you combine this tip with the first tip – our minds become so sharp and the clarity you will feel will make you want to keep it up!
As I said at the beginning, I love what I do, but sometimes I have felt like I’m over it. I thought I didn’t want to do it anymore on more than one occasion. I needed to get away from it to reset and refresh. Try and catch the warning signs early on and listen to your body and mind. Putting into practice the above tips early on and consistently will help you get through and over burnout/mind fog. Key word there is consistently. Try and maintain it long term. It can be hard, but it’s certainly a life changer in more ways than one!
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